The Girl in the Red Boots: Making Peace with My Mother


Product Details

$16.95  $15.76
She Writes Press
Publish Date
5.5 X 8.5 X 0.9 inches | 0.71 pounds

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About the Author

Judith Ruskay Rabinor, PhD, is a clinician, author, writing coach, speaker, and workshop leader. In addition to her New York City private psychotherapy practice, she offers remote consultations for writers, clinicians and families. She has published dozens of articles for both the public and professionals and has authored two books, A Starving Madness: Tales of Hunger, Hope and Healing (Gurze Books, 2002) and Befriending Your Ex After Divorce: Making Life Better for You, Your Ex and Yes, Your Ex! (New Harbinger Publications, 2012). A sought-after speaker and workshop leader, Judy speaks at national and international mental health conferences and runs workshops at spas (including Canyon Ranch), colleges and universities (including Harvard University Continuing Education), and retreat centers such as the Esalon Institute, California. She resides in New York City.


Book Excellence Awards: Finalist, Memoir
"This is an introspective work . . . a fascinating examination of how daughters make peace with their moms."
-Kirkus Reviews

"In this engaging book, Rabinor reflects on the most complex, intense and important of all relationships, the one between mothers and daughters. She shares the story of her journey from pain and anger to acceptance and gratitude and explores the journeys of other mothers and daughters too. Rabinor's professional work with eating disorders has given her a unique vantage point on these most timeless of stories. Her book is candid, fresh and inspiring."
-Mary Pipher, author of Women Rowing North and Reviving Ophelia

"The complex relationship between mothers and daughters is brought vividly to life as Rabinor, a psychologist who specializes in mother-daughter relationships, weaves together stories from her office and her life. As she helps others, she sorts out a lifetime of her own unresolved feelings. A riveting read that reminds us that parenting is fragile, love is always flawed and it's never too late to understand ourselves and our mothers."
-Jane Goldberg, author of The Dark Side of Love

"Mother loss comes in many different forms, as Judy Rabinor explores in this affecting story of the fractured, flawed mother-daughter relationship that entangled her for decades. As a long-time psychotherapist, Rabinor is an expert on grief and healing. As a daughter, she longed for a deeper connection with a mother whose imperfect love, ultimately, left her with valuable gifts and insights to share. Both of those threads make The Girl in the Red Boots a unique and valuable contribution in the bereavement field."
-Hope Edelman, New York Times best-selling author of Motherless Daughters, Motherless Mothers, and The Aftergrief

"Dr. Judy Rabinor is not only a master clinician and teacher but also an extraordinarily gifted weaver of a tapestry of healing. The Girl in the Red Boots beautifully illustrates how our own wounds and vulnerabilities can truly inform and inspire our work with our clients. And it also reveals all the ways our clients' journeys can inform and inspire our own healing and recovery. But this book is not simply for psychotherapists and their clients. It's a book for all mothers and daughters everywhere. Actually, speaking as a son and a father, it's a book for all of us. Read it. It will open your heart."
-David Treadway, PhD, author of Treating Couples Well: A Collaborative Guide to Collaborative Family Therapy

"Dr. Rabinor cuts through the common misunderstandings of therapy in an intimate sharing of her work and her life issues; she meets her patients pain for pain. Reading the insights of this wounded healer about the lingering effects of childhood trauma, I nodded in agreement, dazzled."
-Jesse Kornbluth, author and screenwriter

"In this captivating book, Dr. Rabinor lifts the therapeutic veil, revealing her own growth and healing while working with clients' mother-daughter conflicts. She gently guides the reader to discover what happens when one expresses pent-up love rather than pent-up anger. Immersing myself in The Girl in the Red Boots felt like entering a secret sorority where the tensions and conflicts of my own relationship with my mother were soothed by the insight, wisdom, and compassion Dr. Rabinor provided. The result-an enhanced appreciation and longing for my own mother. This is a must-read for anyone who has or is a mother!"
-Dr. Amy Banks, coauthor of Wired to Connect: The Surprising Link Between Brain Science and Strong, Healthy Relationships, founding scholar at the International Center for Growth in Connection (ICGC), and senior scholar at the Wellesley Centers for Women

"I applaud Judy Rabinor for giving women permission to examine their mother-daughter relatio