It's Not about the Wine: The Loaded Truth Behind Mommy Wine Culture
Alcohol isn't going to fix the systemic lack of support for mothers--and pretending it's the solution to surviving motherhood does more harm than good.
A wine glass etched with "Mommy needs wine"; a T-shirt that says, "I wine because my kids whine"; a onesie proclaiming, "I'm the reason mommy drinks." This is Mommy Wine Culture: the pervasive message that alcohol helps us survive motherhood. But according to writer and mother Celeste Yvonne, it's a symptom of a much larger issue: the mental load of motherhood, a burden born from outdated family norms, traditional roles, and a systemic lack of support for moms--all of which impact our mental health.
In this refreshing, honest take on some of the most pressing concerns for twenty-first-century parents, Yvonne mixes research, cultural references, her own story, and engaging interviews with other moms who sought refuge in wine and found a way out. Drinking to blur the tumultuous days of parenting is a catch-22: it actually keeps us from being present during this precious time. It's Not about the Wine pulls back the veil on what's really plaguing mothers, offers tangible tips for how to lighten your mental load, and paves a path forward for all of us who want to survive and thrive during these weary and wonderful years. From advice on talking about your mental load with your partner, to curating the media we consume and the company we keep, to deep reflections about how we use alcohol to manage burnout and stress, Yvonne helps us recognize the messaging of Mommy Wine Culture for what it is: a distraction from what we really need. If you are worn out and looking to evaluate your relationship to alcohol and motherhood, It's Not about the Wine is an invaluable companion.
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About the Author
Celeste Yvonne is a writer, mom, and marketing professional. Her work on parenting, the mental load of motherhood, mommy wine culture, and sobriety resonates with mothers around the world and has been featured in the Washington Post, Good Morning America, the Today show, and Refinery 29, among others. Celeste is more than five years sober and a founding host of the Sober Mom Squad. She is an advocate for mothers who struggle with addiction and a recipient of the Windfelt Inspire Award by the Dry Society Social Club. She lives in Reno, Nevada, with her husband and two boys.
"An essential addition to the quit lit genre. Mommy Wine Culture is incredibly insidious, and Celeste Yvonne faces the topic head-on with history, facts, and personal experience. Anyone interested in parenting or motherhood needs to read this book!" --Amanda White, executive director and licensed therapist at Therapy for Women Center, and author of Not Drinking Tonight
"Celeste Yvonne addresses the elephant in so many playrooms: the tremendous burden that sits on the shoulders of mothers--and why we often turn to alcohol to cope with parenting challenges. She bravely dissects Mommy Wine Culture and reframes how we should look at supporting mothers, providing practical tips families can implement immediately." --Whitney Fleming, author, freelance writer, and social media consultant at Whitney Fleming Writes
"Celeste Yvonne calls out the all-too-common and often-dysfunctional relationship our culture has with alcohol. As you read, you will find yourself nodding along, maybe even seeing bits and pieces of yourself in her story. And I guarantee, you will be inspired to get to a healthier place." --Kate Swenson, author of Forever Boy
"Through stories from Celeste and other strong mothers in recovery, the reader will see how destructive Mommy Wine Culture is. There's one thing for sure: it will help you proudly say no to that drink you don't really want at the playdate and not care what anyone thinks. It's a must-read." --Danielle Sherman-Lazar, author of Living Full
"Celeste Yvonne deconstructs Mommy Wine Culture as a solution to the mental load of motherhood and flips this ongoing struggle that so many women face completely on its head, paving the path to meaningful motherhood and a beautiful life without the damaging effects of alcohol. Celeste has given us a book that is truly revolutionary, wonderful, and wise--a primer on sober living." --Mikala Albertson, MD, author of Ordinary on Purpose
"This book has absolutely revolutionized the way I view my relationship with alcohol. True to her title, Celeste masterfully demonstrates just how deeply Mommy Wine Culture has permeated motherhood, drawing insightful connections between her own personal experiences and the ways in which mothers are still unsupported and unequal on a societal level. This is such an important and informative read for any mom, regardless of whether she drinks." --Emily Solberg, creator and writer behind Shower Arguments with Emily Solberg
"While this book dives deep into the reasons women drink, it does so much more. It is an empathetic and sometimes maddening social commentary on why we feel the need to escape in the first place, the unfair mental load that women and mothers carry, and a helpful instruction manual about how to find solutions that actually help." --Emily Lynn Paulson, author of Hey, Hun and founder of Sober Mom Squad
"Celeste Yvonne has written such a generous, wise, intelligent account of a pervasive cultural phenomenon and its toxic effects. The book doesn't just dismantle the myths perpetuated about Mommy Wine Culture; it draws a road map for escaping them." --Jardine Libaire, coauthor of The Sober Lush
"It's Not about the Wine delivers raw emotion with vetted resources, making sense of how we got here and what to do about it. Celeste Yvonne has successfully executed a modern, convincing, and revolutionary way to help us all rethink the role of alcohol in our lives." --Ashley Reckdenwald, founder and CEO of Working Mom Notes
"You'll see yourself reflected in these pages, not with shame or guilt, but with a keen eye toward all the ways Mommy Wine Culture has manipulated the experience of drinking and motherhood. It's an absolute must-read." --Gemma Hartley, author of Fed Up