How to Be Enough bookcover

How to Be Enough

Self-Acceptance for Self-Critics and Perfectionists
4.9/5.0
21,000+ Reviews
Bookshop.org has the highest-rated customer service of any bookstore in the world

Description

Are you your own toughest critic? Learn to be good to yourself with this clear and compassionate guide.

Do you set demanding standards for yourself? If so, a lot likely goes well in your life: You might earn compliments, admiration, or accomplishments. Your high standards and hard work pay off.

But privately, you may feel like you’re falling behind, faking it, or different from everybody else. Your eagle-eyed inner quality control inspector highlights every mistake. You try hard to avoid criticism, but criticize yourself. Trying to get it right is your guiding light, but it has lit the way to a place of dissatisfaction, loneliness, or disconnection. In short, you may look like you’re hitting it out of the park, but you feel like you’re striking out.

This is perfectionism. And for everyone who struggles with it, it’s a misnomer: perfectionism isn’t about striving to be perfect. It’s about never feeling good enough.

Dr. Ellen Hendriksen—clinical psychologist, anxiety specialist, and author of How to Be Yourself—is on the same journey as you. In How to Be Enough, Hendriksen charts a flexible, forgiving, and freeing path, all without giving up the excellence your high standards and hard work have gotten you. She delivers seven shifts—including from self-criticism to kindness, control to authenticity, procrastination to productivity, comparison to contentment—to find self-acceptance, rewrite the Inner Rulebook, and most of all, cultivate the authentic human connections we’re all craving.

With compassion and humor, Hendriksen lays out a clear, effective, and empowering guide. To enjoy rather than improve, be real rather than impressive, and be good to yourself when you’re wired to be hard on yourself.

Product Details

PublisherSt. Martin's Essentials
Publish DateJanuary 07, 2025
Pages320
LanguageEnglish
TypeBook iconHardback
EAN/UPC9781250291875
Dimensions241.3 X 6.5 X 1.0 inches | 1.1 pounds

About the Author

ELLEN HENDRIKSEN is a clinical psychologist at Boston University's Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders. She is the author of How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, BBC News, New York Magazine, The Guardian, Harvard Business Review, Scientific American, and Psychology Today, among others. She lives in the Boston area with her family.

Reviews

“A fascinating exploration of the costs of perfectionism, How to Be Enough provides a guide to breaking free from self-criticism so you can live a life of joy and fulfillment.” —Olga Khazan, staff writer at The Atlantic and author of Weird: The Power of Being an Outsider in an Insider World

“Dr. Ellen Hendriksen writes with a clinician’s authority and expertise, and with compassion, humor, and deep understanding, she shares a practical, empowering vision of how to heal the perfectionist within, a problem that can too easily hamper many of us. How to be Enough is highly engaging and essential.” —Ken Duckworth, M.D., Chief Medical Officer of National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and author of You Are Not Alone: The NAMI Guide to Navigating Mental Health―With Advice from Experts and Wisdom from Real People and Families

“Anxiety and depression are increasing rapidly, and one of the causes is the increasingly high standards that we are imposing on ourselves for productivity and success. In this brilliant and entertaining book, Dr. Ellen Hendriksen outlines proven steps that will lead to greater satisfaction and happiness in life.” —Dr. David Barlow, Professor of Psychology and Psychiatry Emeritus, and Founder of the Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders at Boston University

“I helped craft speeches for a president, but often struggled with public speaking myself. Dr. Ellen Hendriksen helped me see the sources of my anxieties. With grace and compassion, she helped me find my path to self-acceptance and this remarkable book will help you find yours.” —Terry Szuplat, former White House speechwriter for President Barack Obama, and author of Say It Well: Find Your Voice, Speak Your Mind, Inspire Any Audience

Earn by promoting books

Earn money by sharing your favorite books through our Affiliate program.sign up to affiliate program link
Become an affiliate