Assume Nothing: A Story of Intimate Violence

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Product Details
$28.99  $26.96
Publish Date
6.2 X 9.3 X 1.1 inches | 0.9 pounds

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About the Author

Tanya Selvaratnam is the author of Assume Nothing: A Story of Intimate Violence and The Big Lie: Motherhood, Feminism, and the Reality of the Biological Clock. Her essays have been published in the New York Times, VogueGlamour, Cosmo, CNN, NBC News, and McSweeney’s, and she has been a fellow at Yaddo and Blue Mountain Center. She is an Emmy-nominated and Webby-winning filmmaker, and she has been a producer for the Vision & Justice Project, Joy To The Polls, Aubin Pictures, Glamour Women of the Year, The Meteor, For Freedoms, NGO Forum/Fourth World Conference on Women in China, and Planned Parenthood; and for artists such as Mickalene Thomas and Carrie Mae Weems.

"Crystal prose, precise and calm, grants Selvaratnam's narrative of manipulative abuse, a profound ethical clarity. A grave book, a powerful and essential book."--Kiran Desai, Man Booker Prize-winning author of The Inheritance of Loss
"Assume Nothing is a searing account of Tanya Selvaratnam's relationship with one of the most powerful men in New York. In lucid prose, she recounts the confusion of signals--the loving embrace turned choke hold--and her struggle to reclaim her voice and power. This book is a necessary and important addition to the conversation around #MeToo--and a gift to women everywhere."--Danzy Senna, author of CAUCASIA and NEW PEOPLE
"Assume Nothing is a harrowing story of the illusions we live with about power and authority and the splits between our public and private selves. This book illustrates how vulnerable we all are; even those who outwardly seem so strong have ancient fractures, points of entry where we are susceptible to the debilitating darkness of others."--A.M. Homes, author of The Mistress's Daughter and May We Be Forgiven
"Part survivor's tale and part exposé of intimate violence, the book offers a candid, often frightening exploration of the diabolically schizophrenic ways that the patriarchy conspires to disempower women."--Kirkus Reviews
"Every woman who tells her story of experiencing sexual violence is brave. But it takes a particularly strong breed of courage to tell the story of how an outspoken advocate for women's issues becomes embroiled in an abusive relationship, and that is Tanya Selvaratnam's story. Assume Nothing is a vivid accounting of her experience, and it demolishes dozens of old cliches in one fell swoop: the stereotype of the typical victim, for one, and the image of the typical abuser, for another. Read it. It has the power to change how we all think--and what we put up with."--Cindi Leive, journalist; senior fellow, USC Annenberg School for Communications and Journalism
"Assume Nothing is raw, gut-wrenching, and honest in its exposure of how--and why--women find themselves trapped in the stories that comprised their childhoods, with particular attention to the shame that comes from believing that they should have known better."--Library Journal (starred review)
"This courageous and terrifying book charts the author's descent into an abusive relationship and also her emergence from it in taut, seductive prose. Selvaratnam explains how--even as an educated, sophisticated, liberal feminist--she was enthralled by her lover's fame and tolerated escalating personal violence. Her narrative is vivid and bracingly frank, a tour-de-force of self-revelation and, ultimately, of redemption." --Andrew Solomon, National Book Award-winning author of Far from the Tree and The Noonday Demon
"In Assume Nothing, Selvaratnam very bravely and compellingly uses her personal experience to shine a light on the global crisis of violence against women. An important book for the women's rights movement, Assume Nothing demonstrates that violence against women exists across race, class, economic status and education levels, and may be perpetrated by those we think of as allies! It dispels the myth that there are certain types of victims and perpetrators. It will help a lot of people, and particularly those who hesitate to identify as a victim/survivor for fear of losing their grounding both publicly and privately." --Yasmeen Hassan, Global Executive Director, Equality Now