Not Always in the Mood: The New Science of Men, Sex, and Relationships


Product Details

Rowman & Littlefield Publishers
Publish Date
6.1 X 0.9 X 9.1 inches | 1.0 pounds

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About the Author

Sarah Hunter Murray, PhD, is a leading researcher on sexual desire. For over a decade, she has dedicated her career to examining the nuances of sexuality as they affect modern relationships. Murray is best known for her groundbreaking work challenging traditional assumptions about men's desire. Murray is a regularly sought-after sex and relationship expert for media outlets including Men's Health, Fashion Magazine, Elle and Today's Parent. Her research has been featured in LiveScience,, Jezebel, and The Globe and Mail. She authors the blog "Myths of Desire: Rethinking Sex Roles and Expectations that Stifle Relationships" for Psychology Today. Her work has also been featured in several journals including the Journal of Sex Research, Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, and Sex Roles. As a practicing relationship therapist under the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT), she specializes in working with individuals and couples around sexual intimacy concerns. Sarah lives in Winnipeg, Canada, with her husband and two children.


Not Always in the Mood confronts the myths and misconceptions about men -- they're always ready for and desiring sex -- and clearly illuminates how those myths and misconceptions are harmful not only to men, but also to the women who love and care about them. In thoughtful, nonjudgmental, practical, compassionate and engaging language, Dr. Murray helps men and women explore and rethink preconceived beliefs and cultural messaging about sex, intimacy and desire, and offers ways for couples and would-be couples to better communicate about what have been admittedly uncomfortable conversations.--Vicki Larson, Award-winning journalist and co-author of "The New I Do: Reshaping Marriage for Skeptics, Realists and Rebels"
From Elizabeth Bernstein 2/2/2019 article on "Debunking the Myths About Male Sexuality" - Long-held stereotypes contend they're always interested in sex; happiest being the pursuer; focused on the physical rather than the emotional connection. If we discuss male sexuality at all, we tend to focus on the darker, toxic side "the entitlement and aggression increasingly exposed by the #MeToo movement. But a new book coming out Feb. 12, "Not Always in the Mood: The New Science of Men, Sex, and Relationships" by Sarah Hunter Murray, debunks a number of commonly held myths about male sexuality. It explores how a man's desire fluctuates, why most men are eager to please their partner, and how sex "or the lack of it" affects men emotionally.--The Wall Street Journal
What's gotten lost in all the hype about an epidemic of low sexual desire in women is that a sizable number of men also lose their desire for sex. When a man experiences low desire the effects on a relationship can be disastrous. Finally, there is a book that addresses this overlooked issue by challenging the myths about masculine sexuality that often contribute to the problem or disrupt the solution. As a sex therapist, I will recommend this book to patients and as a woman I will look forward to reading it. This is a long overdue and much needed resource. Sarah Murray has the credentials to author this book and the writing skills to make it accessible reading to the wide audience who will find this a relevant and fascinating topic.--Kathryn Hall, Ph.D, Author of "Reclaiming Your Sexual Self: How You Can Bring Desire Back into Your Life", Co-editor of Principles and Practice of "Sex Therapy, 5th Edition", Co-editor of "The Cultural Context of Sexual Pleasure and Problems: Psychotherapy with Diverse Clients", President - Society for Sex Therapy and Research Private Practice, Princeton, NJ
This is the book we've been waiting to read, one that helps us better understand why men are the way they are. In this wonderful, readable, and authoritative book, Dr. Murry tells the truth about many of the myths of manhood that we have taken as fact. Not Always in the Mood: The New Science of Men, Sex, and Relationships is a book I highly recommend for all men and women who want to improve their sex and love lives.--Jed Diamond, PhD, author of "12 Rules for Good Men" and "The Irritable Male Syndrome"
In her excellent book, Dr. Murray shares the latest research findings in the field which is good news for all men and women who want to feel less stress and worry about sex. . . . Her book goes a long way in helping us all have a more relaxed, joyful, and passionate love life.--The Good Men Project